The Magician

Glorious Saturday! I made a delicious pitcher of Thai iced tea that's ready to drink today. I'm going to have it with the cream-top milk that I bought yesterday and I will get so fat! I wish I had friends out here so we could drink the entire pitcher at once, and then range out, caffeine addled, and have an energetic night on the town followed by a night of intense sleeping.

The Magician has appeared. He makes me feel like science. Over his head, the infinity sign floats like a halo, and he's wearing the ouroboros as a belt. The tools of his craft lie before him: the sword, the rod, the cup, the pentacle. Herbs and shapes hang above him. He's ready to turn lead into gold, maybe solve a few principles of the universe before turning in for the night. Action, conscious awareness, concentration, and power are his companions. He is the ultimate achiever.

There could not be a card that is more opposed to my life as I am living it right now. Where I fear to act, the Magician represents fearlessness, belief in oneself and willingness to put that belief on the line. Where I lack full understanding, the Magician represents utter awareness of the situation. And where I am focused on my inner world, the Magician lives in the outer world, the world of action and miracles. I wish I could be like the Magician.

All my cards seem to be following a certain progression so far. I've started out in the emotional doldrums, I want to harness the graceful ability of the Two of Pentacles, and now I've come to one of the most action-packed cards in the tarot. It could be telling me to act now, to jump at an opportunity that is right in front of me if only I can see it. The trouble is that I can't see what it's trying to tell me. Is there suddenly an available job at the library? A book store? If I put in my volunteer application at the library, will they accept me even without Colorado residence? I wish I had more insight, because I feel lost.

I think that I'll try to get residency again on Monday. The government being what it is, their offices are closed today and Sunday, so I really have no choice but to wait until I act. One of the big problems I've run into with job applications here is that about 75% of them require in-state residency. Last time I went in to get residency, the wheel of fortune turned and all the computers in the city government were suddenly down, and they couldn't possibly issue me a new license at that time. But if the Magician is telling me what I think he's telling me, I need to act soon. This is the only part of all this that I'm sure I need to take care of before I can do anything at all.

The Magician sees things with clarity, and advises us that if we understand our goals, we have the power to reach them. I hope he's right.